I Put Pretty Pillows On My Bed

My smart phone tweeted a wake up tune. The house was quiet but my mind loudly swirled with all that the upcoming day would serve me. An ache droned in the pit of my stomach. Nerves and anxiety took their place. The warm soft covers soothed just a bit. But, at 6am in the morning I have duties, I have responsibilities that propel me out of the covers and toward the things that moms do to get everyone out the door in one piece. I combed his wet little head and listened to silly jokes that 5 year olds find hysterical. I then trekked back to my room to comb my own hair and throw on my tennis shoes. My routine told me that I have a work out today. So I continued on.

Pretty pillows


The un-made bed called my name. That sense of tidy-ness that doesn’t necessarily define my nature but gives me a sense of accomplishment in the morning again propelled me. I pulled the sheets tight and straighten the crisp white quilt. Leaning down to add the pretty decorative pillows my mom sewed for me years ago I almost stopped in mid task. Remembering all the pressures of the upcoming day I stood there tempted.

Why make the bed? Why tidy up if you are just going to jump back in there later this morning? A day in the bed is just what you need.

The idea of throwing the covers over my head and hiding out with a quiet house and a busy mind seemed like the perfect way to escape. I like to escape. I like to allow my self-made bed cave to envelope and lure me back to a sleep in a place where deadlines exist not. A dream land where pressure and well…life…is just quiet and peaceful.

But I know how this plays out. After hours of hiding and denying the part of me that knows that I’m hiding and denying shouts, “STOP! Get yourself together. Just do it. Just tackle it. Quite hiding and LIVE!

That part of me is the Holy Spirit drawing me out of my denial and avoidance and into His abundance waiting for those who resist the temptation of self-focus. Yes, that is self focus I’m dealing with. For when I’m turned inward to such a degree where I think I can’t handle the pressure, I can’t measure up, I have nothing of value to add, I’m pushing out the absolute reality that it is not about what I can’t do. It is not about what I can’t handle or what I can’t bring to the table.

No…it is about what God does in me and through me. 

My act of crawling back in the bed keeps me from stepping into my purpose for the day: seeking out Jesus, living in worship, serving out of love.

So, I begrudgingly add the pretty pillows to the bed and move on knowing this simple task of making the bed serves to cut off the temptation of hiding and denying. Though I begrudge the idea that I must get over myself, my past experience of LIVING and seeking and worshipping Him outweighs.

I add the pretty pillows and get on with the day.

***I would love to know what keeps you in a place of self focus? Do you have your own “cave” you hide in?

***Do you see value in intentionally stopping yourself for hiding and denying so you can LIVE?

Leave a comment…let’s chat!
{photo credit: sweetjessie via photopin cc}


I Put Pretty Pillows On My Bed — 6 Comments

  1. It doesn’t bode well that I’m reading this on my phone in BED… Sigh…and my main incentive to get up is to reheat the coffee my sweet girl must have left me half an hour ago.

  2. I do this all the time with the bed! And when the bed is made it is the phone or computer that draws me out of doing what I should be doing. This morning reading your blog is not included in that though. These passages are meaningful and teach compared to just surfing and commenting on social media. Thank you for this! I definitely find myself escaping to those things above when all I need to do or am called to do mounts but I need to let the Holy Spirit help me more and more and call on Him!

  3. I’m not sure I have a cave to hide in, life just won’t allow it but there can be a place of self focus just within my head. I don’t think of it as a cave because it doesn’t console but brings grief as you know. My answer is praying for others. When I catch myself too self absorbed and it can go on long before you catch yourself, then I pray for others and it’s a sure fire “cure” so to speak! This is a wonderful post, addressing something that many would not want to admit happens.

  4. There has been days to that I haven’t wanted to get out of bed. The bad weather of the snow on the ground in the winter and when it is a rainy day outside.But I get up each morning and fix my teenage sons and my husband something for breakfast and see them off to school and my husband off to work then I take a shower before I start each day. Then I read my Bible for 30 minutes and then pray.Then I ask the Lord what He wants me to do for him today. I set a listen for his whisper to tell me and for him to show me what he wants me to do for him every single day them I do what he says. The Lord is good all the time.

  5. Oh honey , you learned it from me. I was not a good model for you i am sad to say. At that time of my life I didn’t have Jesus to get me going. Now I do!!!! Hey the funny thing about it. I am having the same struggles. I think all of us have a little procrastination in our mind. I love the way you used the pillows as a go to get to work sign. I just might have to try that. It does feel good to see a pretty bed that you just don’t want to mess up. Yes you have a lot to do and I am so proud of you for admitting you little weakness. God’s not finished with you yet. And I know He has BIG plans for you. Don’t get overwhelmed….get over excited!!!!! I just can’t imagine what he has in store for you….and me. I love surprises!!!!

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