Day 5 Stress Point Intense Relationships: Have Your Own “Stuff”

 I really think I might step on some toes today with this but…here goes…

We must have our own “stuff” with God. We must have our own worship, our own prayer time our own Bible time alone with Jesus. This means we can’t be dependent on the faith of our significant other which is susceptible to falter and wavering. Everyone is human. We all make mistakes and allow our faith to become lukewarm. But, when our relationship with Jesus is so intermingled with what our boyfriend, fiance or spouse’s faith, we lose our individual and meaningful connection with our King.

~Having our own “stuff” with God means that we worship Him like He is the only one in the room. (Regardless if our guy is standing right next to us at church)

~Having our own “stuff” with God means that we take time alone to pray. (Even when our guy wants all or our time to himself)

~Having our own “stuff” with God means that we read the Bible and let the Holy Spirit teach us how to apply it to our life. (Not relying on the faith and beliefs of our guy)

Totally not man-bashing here. I would tell my guy friends the same thing, too…We must allow our boyfriends, fiances and husbands to have THEIR OWN STUFF with God as well. 

Truth Point: For the LORD your God is a consuming fire, a jealous God. (Deuteronomy 4:24)

From my book Stress Point: Thriving Through Your Twenties In A Decade Of Drama 

Don’t let the word jealous trip you up, though. Today, jealousy is attributed to relationships in general, and we often think about a raging, irrational, jealous boyfriend or girlfriend flying off the handle upon finding his or her significant other cheating. But our current definition—however distorted by imperfect humans—does in fact accurately represent a characteristic of our King of Kings. The word jealous comes from the Latin word zeal. Merriam-Webster defines it as “one who is intolerant of rivalry or unfaithfulness and vigilant in guarding a possession.” Before you tie a negative, cultural view of the word jealous to your King, take a moment to comprehend this fact:

The creator of the universe, the God who hung the moon and the stars and can move mountains with just a word from His powerful voice, wants every single ounce of your attention and affection. This desire for your love and worship is so intense it is like a consuming, holy, pure fire. 

To worship our King with our intense relationships is to bring to the throne our passionate, romantic feelings that swell in our hearts and oftentimes overwhelm us to the point where we worship the guys in our lives instead of our Divine, Jealous God. This happens to the best of us when we are so in love and in the pre-intensity stage of the relationship, and all we want to do is spend every waking hour with our guy. What happens, then, is we begin to do what the Israelites did: worship an idol (our guy) rather than our amazing, loving, powerful King. By not allowing ourselves to drown in a sea of emotions that surround a newly-intensified relationship, we make room in our lives to delight in the Lord first, which is what brings us true fulfillment in relationships. {Stress Point page 103}