Did that title catch your attention? Well, I just have to say I’m being snarky. I actually don’t know how to NOT be awkward but I’m starting to learn how to well…cope…with the awkward. More on that in a bit.

{So many of you have been super kind and encouraging in my prelude to the big move from North Carolina to Texas. I wanted to take a post to give an update on what’s transpired and what I’ve learned so far.}

Monday morning. A day to prep and pack for a month of living in temporary housing. A day to get my thoughts together, pack and then pair down again everything we need for a month’s worth of doing life in a new town. Not much would fit in our car. Yes…I know…#firstworldproblems here. I get that.

The door bell rings and on our porch stands a small army of sweet women ready to pack our house. Top to bottom. A day early. Unexpected. Unplanned for. I panic as my mind rushes to the hopeful showing on our house to sell IN AN HOUR.  In a matter of minutes, my show-ready house (spic and span I tell you) turned upside down with boxes, paper, tape and one wild women (me!) rushing to gather said things for the next month for fear they would end up in boxes in a matter of minutes.

Things settle down and the Lord blessed us with a smooth packing/movers experience. Our little family squeezed tight into the SUV. We made sure to pack our bathing suits (moving to Texas means tons of pool time) and you better believe that ALL my most treasured art supplies found a special spot in the car. Maybe at the expense of some toys for my 7 year old? Don’t judge. He’s fine. :) The trek across country proved smooth and uneventful which is a good thing for sure.

We made it to Aggieland in three days. This is the town that stole my heart more than 15 years ago. It’s the town I studied (just a bit), played hard, found “myself”, cheered at football games, played hard (not gonna lie), graduated from, and most importantly…met the love of my life. It is good to be back here. It makes my heart smile to share memories with my son from the glory days. He thinks college sounds fun because you can eat lunch whenever you like and eat whatever you like. I had to smirk a little and refrained from explaining to him the Freshman 15 Phenomenon. The things that stick out in the mind of a 7 year old… We can’t wait for all the students to come back and for Aggie football to commence.

I wrote HERE about the identity crisis and my fears of being the new girl again. I haven’t been the new girl in years. The thought made me shudder. I’m usually one for the adventure of newness, but this did me in. God is so good. So good. Honestly, I felt funny taking such an insecure prayer to Him about friendships. But, as I type this, I’m reassured once again that we can be confident to take anything and everything––even prayers of awkwardness––to the Throne. Hebrews 4:16 is the truth I stand on in this moment.

Through connecting with old friends and meeting new friends from the churches we’ve been visiting, God has whispered to my heart that prayers were heard and held in His hands with care. Our hearts are in His hands. He delicately showers with grace from friends that want my son to come to playdates. Yes, the prayers of friendship are for the entire family and He has come through. Yes, we are still meeting and exploring and getting to know. In the meantime, our sweet family has cherished the welcome to Texas so freely poured upon us.

So here’s my advice on how to NOT be awkward. It stems from several new friend introductions where I babbled and stumbled my words and said dumb things in a moment of insecurity. You know those moments where you feel all gangling and unsure like the middle school years? That was me. Tongue tied and just weird. You know, those moments where you replay conversations back in your head like an old cassette tape? Maybe I’m the only one that does that…that tortures myself like that.

As I sat with the Lord and chatted about these moments of awkward, He sweetly spoke to my heart that it is ok to be awkward. And I’m going to hang on to this. Because here’s the deal, other people feel awkward, too. Usually we are so focused on our own weirdness and insecurity we can hardly notice others and their own. Right? So I find solace in that fact: we all have our own issues with what other’s may or may not think of us. And maybe, just maybe, our awkward might disarm someone else and allow for freedom to just be. Just be and just say and just smile and just get to know someone with out expectations of perfection. There’s ministry in that I’m sure of it.

So that’s where I am right this moment. I will write more on the friendship thing soon. In the meantime check out my friend Lara Casey’s amazing summer series called Fruitful Summer. It’s all about cultivating intentional relationships.

I hope your summer is going well! Keep approaching the throne of Grace with Your Jesus. He is WORTHY. He IS GOOD. He is full of Grace and Mercy and it is there for the taking. (Hebrews 4:16)